Monday, December 10, 2018

SJW Couple Accidently Writes the Greatest Black Knight Song of All Time

UPDATE:  This post is turning into a holiday classic here at the Dark Herald.  On the bottom paragraph you will see that I mentioned the strong possibility of an infringement letter.

Yep, they got one.


Oh they didn't mean to write the greatest black knight song of all time.  That was nowhere in the picture when they did it and they probably have no idea what Black Knighting is.

But none the less they managed it.

The song they were attempting to maul was that comically flirtatious holiday ballad of seduction; Baby It's Cold Outside.

This classic is a product of the 1940s and it shows.  The song was first performed by a husband and wife song writing team at a party for their friends.  Game aware innuendo is most sultry felt through out.

The first line, "I really can't stay."  Translates to modern English as, "we're not having sex."  I assume you are all far enough along to know what that actually means.

Good! Glad you're up to speed.

Now, I rather like the song myself.

Have a listen to the original version.  This one has KHAAAAAAN, singing it.

It's harmless, playful and impish.  It's also completely obvious that the girl is only doing a hard to get routine. She was always planning to stay the night but she wants a bit of seduction first to build sexual tension.  She is right to do so, it will make things more fun for both of them later, when she "gives in to her baser urges."

As I said a holiday classic that has been enjoyed by two generations of adults and rejected by a third  that finds Pepe LePew "triggering".

Naturally SJWs tried to ruin it as instinctively as a beaver builds a dam...And failed epically.

From the Huffpogue

If you’ve ever listened to the classic Christmas song “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” then you know it’s a really screwed up tune.

A couple from Minneapolis, Minnesota, found the ditty so unnerving that they decided to revamp it for a modern audience, reworking the lyrics to “emphasize the importance of consent,” according to CNN.

The original 1944 lyrics by Frank Loesser include problematic lines like, “What’s in this drink?” crooned by a woman and “What’s the sense in hurtin’ my pride?” by the man.

The duo, singer-songwriters Lydia Liza and Josiah Lemanski, told CNN that they felt that the original song was “aggressive and inappropriate,” arguing that the listener never finds out what happens to the woman in the song.

“You never figure out if she gets to go home. You never figure out if there was something in her drink. It just leaves you with a bad taste in your mouth,” said Liza.

The couple’s revised lyrics are adorably consensual, opening with “I really can’t stay” sung by Liza and “Baby, I’m fine with that” sung by Lemanski.

Most notably, when Liza sings, “I ought to say no, no, no,” Lemanksi responds with “You reserve the right to say no.”

And with you the answer will always be, no because no woman willing goes to bed with a Gamma SJW.

I know this gamma muffin was trying to plagiarize his way to a paean on the joys of Consent.  What he actually managed to create was pretty much much the opposite.  It's the story of a Man with Options and he wants to exercise the Put Option.  Here are some of the most unintentionally funny lyrics I've ever read.

I Really Can't Stay...Baby, I'm Fine with That! 

I have to go away...Baby, I'm cool with That!

This evening has been so very nice...I'm hoping you get Home safe!

This sounds for all the world like a guy who is trying like hell to end a really shitty date with a girl who is just so fucking clingy.

Things are obviously going to get brutal fast if she doesn't leave soon.  The early days of Game are gone for this player, he isn't willing to hop on just about anything that moves anymore.  Women, while once  an unbearable source of hopeless longing, have become a bother and a nuisance at this point.

He doesn't just have Options, he has Priorities.  

He is not seeing a night of wild, delicious carnal passion ahead.  No, he is looking at her and seeing two and half hours of sleep he won't be getting back.  He has got a meeting first thing in the morning that he has to be sharp for.  The snow is getting bad, so the driveway is going to have to be cleared before he can launch which means no breakfast, again.  And if he doesn't get this bitch on the road soon, she is going to be stuck there all damn night.  She is just not worth the bother, it's not like she brought her twin sister along.

Consent is so important and I'm not giving you mine.

Anyway, enjoy this rib tickler of a song while you still can because in case you are wondering, the answer is, no.  Baby It's Cold Outside, is NOT in public domain.  Thanks to the Huffington Post this idiot SJW couple has now been sky lined enough, that they will be staring down the barrel of an infringement letter shortly.


Yeah they got hit with cease and desist and had to take their song down.

Here's my favorite version of the original.


ghostfromplanetspook said...

I have a line for you:

Been a great date.....Sorry to tell you, I'm gay

Joe Katzman said...

Damn. Now we'll never hear the lyrics!

Mr.MantraMan said...

White progs, what's for dinner? If it weren't for white conservatives who fail nearly every stupid shit test the white progs throw out there white progs would be eaten by their political allies.

Mr.MantraMan said...

Some factoid I gleaned of twitter which might or might not be true, but in itunes supposedly the Dean Martin version is the #2 downloaded holiday song.